Saturday, June 27, 2009

Out of the Comfort Zone: Meeting Strangers

The world is full of fascinating people! Yet, sometimes we are so caught up with our own activities or afraid of talking to strangers that we miss numerous connections and opportunities. Learning to step out of one's comfort zone and strike up conversations with strangers is a great way to improve your social skills, grow as a person and discover more about our intriguing world. I want to offer you a new paradigm, which will bring greater joy and freedom!

Understandably, there is naturally a little uncertainty or nervousness about talking to someone new. You don't know what sort of person they are, what interests them, or nearly anything else about them. What if they are really weird and unusual? What if they are mean or mind-numbingly boring? Such questions stem from fear-based thinking and are based on false assumptions about people. The truth is, most people are quite normal and typically strangers are friendlier than you would expect. I know this from experience.

Nearly every time I'm out in public, I end up meeting someone new or talking to someone that I have never seen before. This afternoon, when I was at Starbucks, I met a fascinating, articulate, intelligent young man who is very passionate about exposing the lies that are propagated by the American government and mass media. We had an in-depth discussion about the state of our nation and how many mainstream ideas are harmful and untrue. I met him completely by coincidence. He was reading a book, and I simply asked him a question about it. That single question launched a scintillating discussion for over an hour.

This sort of thing is hardly a rare occurrence. I regularly meet new and interesting people. Part of this stems from my attitude towards strangers. I view every stranger as simply a friend that I haven't yet met. Because I view most people as naturally friendly, interesting and talkative, I have no troubles striking up conversations about any number of topics. Secondly, I not only view other people as fascinating and sociable, but I also know that I am an interesting person to talk to and therefore assume that most people would quite enjoy talking to me, given the chance. Since talking to a stranger is a mutually enjoyable and beneficial event, it becomes rather easy to meet new people.

Sometimes a person feels timidity about beginning a conversation, and the possibility of rejection. However, rejection is a very harmless worst-case scenario. Even if someone doesn't want to talk to you, you have lost nothing. You didn't know them before, and you don't know them now. No big deal! Yet, the potential gain is limitless! You never know if the next person you meet may be your future spouse, your new best friend or a profitable business client. Once you recognize that you have nothing to lose and everything to gain, most of the fear and timidity related to talking to strangers goes away.

Besides having a paradigm that views meeting strangers as a positive experience, I also take action to initiate conversations. Last week I was hanging out at Starbucks in the evening and I noticed a couple of girls playing Scrabble. Since Scrabble is one of my favorite board games, I came to see how their game was progressing and what amazing words they had used. After that I sat down by myself to work on an essay I was writing, but soon I noticed that they had finished their first round of Scrabble and were about to play again. I asked them if I could join them and they were happy to have another player. We had a really fun time playing Scrabble and chatting about life, school and the joys of summer.

These are just a couple everyday experiences that I have in meeting strangers. I am always meeting new and exciting people! If you adopt a similar mindset and take action to strike up conversations, you will quickly find more people to date, more amazing friends to hang out with and more exciting opportunities arising.

One-Week Challenge:
Strike up a conversation with at least one person you've never talked to before every day for one week. The conversation can be as short as a simple question-and-answer or as long as you wish.

3 comments:

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  2. Operation Mafia has now added a custom feature that allows you to go on Missions. This was a time intensive fully customized feature that utilizes many existing OM features.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Operation Mafia has now added a custom feature that allows you to go on Missions. This was a time intensive fully customized feature that utilizes many existing OM features.

    ReplyDelete